Friday, June 12, 2009

Secret Lovers

That's what we are!!

Sorry Charlie, but I've found a new lover in the desert. He takes care of my needs when I am at my lowest and need him the most. He gives me the juiciest kisses ever. He's so warm; never cold (Diane took care of that*). He always gives; never takes. He's the only one that comforts me when I am struggling....

Yes, I think I have fallen in love with my water bottle.

It all happened a couple of days ago. For those of you that aren't too familiar with the yoga, we begin with a breathing exercise, followed by 3 'warm up postures', and then it's party time. So, after about 30 minutes we take a quick water break - no water is allowed before party time. Well.... the other day while I'm in Eagle (the third warm up posture), I look down longingly and pathetically at my water bottle. It seems this humidity thing is a bit of an issue in the desert (ya think?). I have noticed two degrees of humidity in the hot room here in Desert Springs:

1. Oppressively humid, as in, when it's quiet enough, I can hear the sweat falling from everyone like rain.

2. Bone dry.

This day was a bone dry day. My throat was dry. So dry. I may have actually been sick that day too (which may explain the delusion I am about to describe). Yes, come to think of it, I believe I was quite sick that day. I look at my bottle. Party time is so so so close, but I just don't know if I can make it. As my arms and legs are twisted (yes, like ropes), and I am sitting down (yes, in the chair - not the bar stool), I start considering my situation. What exactly will happen if I partake before the par-tay? Does one spontaneously combust? Does Bikram throw you out, not refund your money, and banish you from practicing his yoga for life? Do you simply become known as the loser who didn't wait for the group break? Cut to me with that longing/puppy dog look on my face, staring down at the open mouth of my water bottle.

Then it talked to me.

Yep, it talked. That mouth moved. It had a voice similar to Barry White's. It said "Don't worry baby, we'll be together soon." That reassurance (reality check - from my WATER BOTTLE) kept me going. I think I nodded my head and thought "Ok, water bottle, you're right."

So this hot new love affair is going strong. In fact, every time I give it that same longing look, this plays in my mind (and no, I'm not just being silly; it really does):

* When Diane was here, she mentioned that ice in your water bottle is not a good idea in the hot room. This is not a habit I have a home, but it was really nice here in the desert. (Note, the past tense of that sentence).
One morning I am at the sign in table. Diane's happy, smiling face greets me.

Me: "Good morning!"
Diane: "Good morning! Is that ICE I see in your bottle??"
Me: A list of excuses and a look of shame.

I have been ice-free since then!


  1. What is THAT, a dolphin?! Where the heck did that come from?? HAHA - you are too funny. Methinks you are getting a little loopy over there. It is terribly cute. "So warm, never cold..." have you ever just said "f*** it" and put tea bags in your water?? I started doing that in LA when I gave up on my water ever being cold and decided to embrace the fact that it was boiling hot. I wanted to see if room temp water could turn into tea by the end of class. Hehe. Now I looooove bringing hot water/tea to class. Of course I will be eating my own words in 3 weeks when I get out there for advanced and they have me begging for a gallon of ice before we hit the first savasana. Hm, I am a little loopy tonight too.

    Keep on rocking out there! Stay proud! Western Mass, REPRESENT!!

    xoxo Juliana

  2. Yes, Juliana. I may have officially lost it. :)
    What a good idea with the tea bags! I have been putting in a few slices of grapefruit, and sometimes some mint leaves as well. Very refreshing :)
    Oh, and that's a Tuna - the Starkist tuna, Charlie. There was a series of commercials where "Sorry Charlie" was always added in there. Youtube it :)

    <3 <3 <3

  3. Yum, mint!! I always like ginger, too... mmm, ginger tea... little extra digestive boost, though I imagine you hardly need that at this point!!

    Love love love, Juliana :)

  4. Hi Jennifer

    I've been following a few of the other Training blogs, but I just found your blog a couple of days ago. I went to Spring 2007 Teacher Training in Honolulu & teach in Portland, OR. When I just scrolled down to your link to 'What's Up' & played it, it gave me goosebumps & brought back some great memories of this very week (Weeek #8). One of my fellow Students performed the song at the Talent Show on Friday night of Week #8. Then, after the Saturday class, the Four Non-Blondes original version was blasted through the speakers of the Yoga Room.

    Congratulations on your Training! You're almost to Graduation! Enjoy the last couple of weeks as much as possible!!!


  5. Ron,

    Thanks for reading, and thanks for the encouragement! I can't wait for the talent show - I expect it will be sometime soon (the haven't announced the date/time yet).
    And Portland, huh? Never been there, but it's one of the places I want to visit most!


  6. I found your blog today through links with other Bikram blogs.

    HILARIOUS! Your "Secret Lovers" is truly destined to be a classic. Love the picture of the bottle. I, too, can hear Barry White so either there IS something magical about your bottle or we are both delusional.

    Keep up the great work you are doing in California. I know your sense of humor is going to make you a great teacher.

  7. POSTSCRIPT: I'm lucky that Di wasn't at advanced this time around cause I was SHAMELESS with the ice water in Palm Springs. SHAMELESS, I TELL YOU. Like, I brought an entire cooler of just ice down from my room so that I could put more ice in my water when the first ice melted. I suck!! Hahahahaha...


I am far from home. I am out of any sort of conceivable comfort zone. My body aches. Encouragement/cheerleading is very much appreciated :) !!